Author

Subject: wedding gowns

Nani

17:27 08/03/2002 

I was in a small room full of white wedding gowns. They belonged to other women and were carefully hung, some in plastic covers.

My daughter and some of her friends arrived. They're fabulous fun 13 yr olds. I suggested or allowed them to dress up in these gowns. They had a wonderful time and danced around laughing, looking gorgeous.

One of the gowns was black with a beautiful black headpiece. It looked stunning on the girl wearing it.

I had niggling concerns that I was looking after these dresses for others, and they were very precious to them. Then the girls took the dresses off and just dumped them on the floor and left. I looked at them and was horrified. The floor was strewn with a mass of crumpled tulle, satin and silk.

At that moment one of the owners arrived back and was furious. I knew I had no right to let the girls wear them. It was an impulsive thing I did and now I felt mortified and ashamed.

I have posted a dialogue on this dream below.

Dream edited for easier reading - JT, 2005

Read the original thread or Jane Teresa's view.

Nani

17:41 08/03/2002 

Now the 2nd part. I followed the suggestion on my previous entry to try and work out what the white car in that dream represented and it was totally wierd and unexpected. It went like this:

Me: OK White Car, why were you in my dream -why were you white - my cars in dreams are usually red?

White Car: White is the colour of my true loves light, in the morning

Me: That's a barstardisation of a song

WC: Yes, but it's a nice song - about his or her love

Me: But why are you a white car?

WC: I'm a car - your journey, your path, your progress. I'm white, I'm love, I'm goodness

Me: OK I think - anything else you want to add?

WC: We're in it together you and me, with love

It's strange, but it felt like the answer. So my question is this. Does the colour white symbolise the same thing in both dreams, and if so how does it relate to the wedding gowns. This I dont get.

Love to all out there Nani

Oh, and when the car says we're in it together you and me, is that my higher and lower self, or my - no I've got it, my conscious and sub-conscious, which I suppose is the same thing anyway.

Lena

07:13 09/03/2002 

Hi Nani,

I see weddings as a marriage of two partners.

White for me is also about pure love, as your white car told you.

"Plastic covers" - something artificial that covers up the real thing.

I usually think of the "sub-concious" as the "unconcious".

I hope that helps to get the meaning out for you.

Angela

00:29 10/03/2002 

Hi Nani and Lena,

Scientifically speaking, the colour white is the embodiment of all colours. That may give you another hint, Nani.

Angela.

Nani

07:34 11/03/2002 

Hi Lena and Angela,

Thanks for your input. I just can't seem to make sense of this one. It was just the smallest fragment of a dream, the rest of which I can't remember. Maybe it's not that important, but it does intrigue me. And frustrate me.

Thanks Nani

Lena

08:21 11/03/2002 

Hi Nani,

EVERY dream message is important!

Why don't you try another discussion between a white wedding dress and a black one?

I'm sure you'll crack it eventually.

Lena

Jane Teresa Anderson

09:37 12/03/2002 

Hi Nani,

I'd like to add:

The dresses all belonged to other women - think of these other women as various facets of yourself, particularly your Yin (inner world) self.

The dresses were wedding dresses - union, integration. Had they been used for each owner's wedding, or were they for future weddings, do you think? Did they represent integrations/beliefs you have celebrated and are hanging onto (in plastic, under cover) or integrations/ beliefs you are preparing to celebrate, preparing to commit to (wedding) in the world?

White - you have, from your dialogue: "in this together". Indeed these women are all in this together with you. Your work is integrating these beliefs (love? committing in public??).

Black - possibly the unconscious, possibly your 'dark' side or shadow side. You loved the stunning beauty of the black dress in the dream. What is the dark side you'd like to show the world? Or what, we wonder, is it in your unconscious that is of stunning beauty that is ready to be shown to the world or being kept covered in plastic?

Your daughters and friends had fun USING the dresses. Fun to be had in USING the beliefs - playing - showing the world - rather than in keeping them covered?

The dresses are in a small room. Small? Small as in restricted or small as in not much room to be expansively joyful and full of fun, or small as in easy to order, organise and contain? Contemplate these, Nani. The room probably represents the area of your mind where you are currently storing these wedding dress beliefs. Why would your dream see it as small?

Finally (though much more could be asked), what impulsive action have you taken recently that left you feeling a bit mortified and ashamed? (Dreams pump up the feelings to draw them to your attention, so look for shades of these feelings associated to a recent event. Also, dream feelings reflect feelings submerged or semi-submerged in your unconsious ...)

In a dream, look for sets of opposites. You have:

Fun - Ordered, covered (restrained?)

White - black.

Used - unused or saved.

Impulsive - mortified ???

The main issue in your dream appears to be freedom/fun versus restraint/responsibility ... I'm playing around the words, not being accurate, so that you can discover the actual issue yourself, Nani.

Hope this helps,

Jane Teresa Anderson

Nani

19:17 16/03/2002 

Hello Everyone, And thanks for your help Jane Teresa. I haven't been able to get online for a few days so hope this is still read by some of you.

What I find really interesting is that I took your advise Lena, a few days before Jane Teresa's posting, and had a conversation between the black dress and the white dresses which was very interesting but which I didn't really understand. However after reading your entry Jane T, some of it made more sense and some of it pointed in the same direction, eg the white dresses symbolising beliefs.

I guess my biggest challenge with these exercises is believing that the writing is not interferred with or created by my conscious self. In other words not trusting it. On the other hand it is so strange to me, to the point of my not understanding it, that I don't know how I can doubt it, yet I do.

So I'd like to share my dialogue with you to see what you think.

Black Dress: So white dresses, what were you doing in the dream?

White Dresses: We're so beautiful, full of dreams and hopes. What are you doing among us?

B.D: I'm one of you but opposite. I'm strong.

W.D: Are you saying we're not?

B.D: Yes. White fluff, raising everyone's expectations, happily ever after blah blah blah.

W.D: But we're beautiful, full of hope, so gorgeous.

B.D: Excuse me but didn't you notice that I'm gorgeous too? Even more so than you. I stand out. I'm unique, individual and, above all strong. And beautiful. And you all ended up dumped on the floor. What does that say about you?

W. D: Some mopping up to be done?

B.D: I'd say, and you, lady who came back angry and who owned one of the dresses, what was your problem?

Lady: Do you have to ask? My beautiful dress, trashed, not looked after and nurtured. Of course I was mad, bloody mad.

B.D: With Nani - maybe you should have looked after the dress yourself. And you girls, why didn't you take the dresses off carefully and hang them up?

Girls: They were fun, they're not important to us. They made us look beautiful for a moment but they're just make believe, a game of dress ups. They're not something that really matters like people or animals.

B.D: What else? Anyone? White dresses, back to you. What actually are you?

W.D: We're not important, we're a symbol but not the real thing. Are we an illusion? Don't know. We're an illusion of love, not the actual thing. We're sorry.

I suppose I wonder whether this excercise has clarified anything or simply added to the confusion. Very interesting.

And to answer some questions, the dresses had been used, they were covered to protect them, the room was small and restrictive, and I have been experiencing feelings of shame from what I percieve as personal failures.

Thanks again for all your assistance. Such a funny wee dream to cause so much soul searching.

Love Nani

Jane Teresa Anderson

17:15 17/03/2002 

This is great work, Nani,

Dialogues seem totally weird when you first start doing them, and often the result seems (at first glance) to be non-sensical. (Like dreams, funny that, hey?!)

But if you keep an open mind and quieten the rational left brain, the dialogue results gradually shift into personal insight.

If you pause while writing, your conscious mind may be directing -hmm- more likely editing. The secret is to write as fast as you can. Gut-reaction, unconscious dialogues only.

Keep looking at your dialogue .... blend in the answers you have given (room restrictive etc) .... look again at the original dream ... let the pieces begin to form a picture.

What role does the strong black dress play in your life now? What is the covering-up / protection dilemma (keeping the dresses covered/protected vs enjoying them)? How does the fluff/illusion belief fit into this?

How do your beliefs and judgements about personal failure resonate with "small, restrictive" and with "protect" ... for example?

Jane Teresa

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