Author

Subject: Cancer

Scarlett

21:49 09/03/2003 

Background: Last night I had a fight with my boyfriend because I got jealous about things he said, small things. He did not do anything wrong. Sometimes I feel humbled, betrayed and have a very painful feeling inside even if no-one has done anything wrong. I only have this when I have a deep relationship (which happened only once before and was destroyed by these feelings). I really have to deal with this because it is damaging my life, especially my relationship!

So before I went to sleep last night I asked my subconscious for help.

Dream: I was travelling around the world (which I have actually done) and then I am back at home doing some work for my first company, working part-time for a project which I did not understand when I was given it the first time.

I remember going out with my colleagues and we suddenly formed a circle and someone was throwing an acorn which I caught. They said I am so lucky and I felt guilty because of this and shared the acorn with the others, which made me happy.

Then suddenly I was in Los Angeles packing to go back home to Vienna, sitting with a working colleague (someone I liked, performing, working almost 20 hours per day, but sympathetic and very clever). He helped me with my project and he was quite smart. I told him I had to go and he started to cry and wanted to kiss me and said that he liked me. I told him he should not because he is married, but he did and I did too and then he went off.

I took some things to eat and went out to offer to the other people. There were people I know from Brazil. Suddenly I saw my parents especially my father.

My father told me that my uncle (we have almost no contact, he has been a very hard working person too and a little snobby) has cancer and is going to die. There is no hope. My father told me that he said this before to me but I did not want to hear it. I remembered.

At this moment I felt very bad and hurt, shocked (in reality I am not close enough to this uncle to feel as bad as I did in my dream) full of pain with tears in my eyes and I could see tears in my father’s eyes.

Dream edited for easier reading - JT, 2005

Jane Teresa Anderson

09:00 12/03/2003 

Hi Scarlett,

Thank you. In answer to your first thought: please don't hesitate to reply to other dreamers - when people reply and give feedback you have the opportunity to discover what works and what doesn't.

Also, if you get a copy of Dream Alchemy, or join up and become a member (and access all the resources), your dream interpretation knowledge will expand and you will feel more confident about reaching out and helping others.

Onto your dream.

There is a lot in your dream of great value. It is a perfect dream for the Members' Forum where people pay close attention to fine details and really go over every part of a dream.

To start:

You asked for the dream because you feel your relationship is one you could lose. The dream ends with a sense of forthcoming loss (the diagnosis of cancer) but it also ends with tears and a real feeling of grief being expressed. When such grief is felt in a dream, a healing process is often occurring - the tears are often the sign of repressed (old, unexpressed) grief being released.

So - the dream suggests an old unexpressed grief may have been/ be contributing to the feeling that you may lose your relationship.

I am intrigued by the acorn. What is the saying?

"Into mighty oaks, little acorns grow"?

Cancer is a disease manifested by growths.

In your dream the acorn was a symbol of your feeling that other people saw your successes as 'good luck' to which you responded by feeling guilty and then trying to share your success (good luck/ acorn) around.

Where in your past have other people's responses led you to feel guilty of your 'good luck'? Were these successes really good luck or did you work hard to achieve them?

Two of the people in your dream are hard workers, so there does seem to be a link between hard work and good luck ... and so with success and (in you) guilt and a need to share round.

Was your argument with your partner centered on work, success ..?

Think about membership, Scarlett, and bringing this dream over into the Members' Forum for deeper discussion so you can get to the bottom of it and find the dream alchemy solution to apply.

(Or you can always consult with me privately - click 'interpretation' on the black menu bar at the top of this page.)

Jane Teresa

Scarlett

22:14 20/03/2003 

Thank you for dealing with my dreams, I am so busy at the moment with finding a new work after my long travelling that I was not able to reply earlier. I definitly plan to enter the memeber forum soon! I am dreaming a lot at the moment and I have the feeling that there are so many different things in my dream and my time to really think about is rare at the moment. I am trying to analyze my dreams with my boyfriend and he want to do it with his too, but he is concerned that this might not be good for our relationship and goes too deep (I do not have this fear). We would appreciate if you could give us your opinion here! In my dreams I have the feeling I am dealing actually with male-female parts integration and not so much with work/success. But maybe my view about my male-part is related with work and success as you said in your interpretation. Just now I had a very picturous dream. I was sitting with a friend (male) of mine in my appartment, I did invite him - as suddenly I heard a key in the door and 5 men (one I recognized as a very old friend from school-times) bursted into the appartment and started to devastate everything! I was confused, sad, angry, shouted with them, begged them to stop and asked for help to the one I had invited. He smiled and said that he is part of that whole thing and that the other men where his friends. I felt betrayed (like in a lot of my dreams before!!!) as he said he gave them the key to enter my house. And I was so afraid that they would take my diary and show to all the people outside, I felt ashamed. After they left, one of them (my school-friend of old times) stayed there, sitting on top of a wardrobe, loughing. I turned to him and said: Why, why, why did you do this!!! I want to know the reason, please tell me why!! And he loughed and said, that there is no reason, they did this just for fun. And I was left with a feeling of sadness...

I have the feeling that I come closer to what my dreams want to tell me as in the beginning my sister was the one who betrayed me and now I come to the male parts (in reality I have never been betrayed by a man, but maybe is something with self-betrayal as Beth analysed in one reply). Thank you for your help! Scarlett