Issue 80, April 2005
Read my t-shirt
©Jane Teresa Anderson, April 2005
There are two t-shirts. One bears the message, ‘No pain, no gain’ while the other reads ‘Life was meant to be easy’. Which one do you choose?
Answer before you read on.
I saw this question recently in a multiple-choice test sent out to candidates applying for an office job. Except the choices weren’t multiple. There were only two. It was an either-or situation: either this t-shirt or that t-shirt, which?
Such choices weren’t meant to be easy. No pain, no gain.
But of course the choice is easy – if you want the job. Every applicant knows that their psychological profile will get a big tick if they choose ‘No pain, no gain’. Easy. As long as you don’t mind compromising on your beliefs to get the job, that is.
I would have failed the test. I can’t be drawn on either-or questions. It just doesn’t fit with my experience of life. When my children were small they’d often bring home questions from the school playground: “Would you rather be eaten by a tiger or a lion?” they’d ask me. “Neither,” I’d reply, truthfully. “Oh Mum!!! Play the game!” I was too serious. They were right. It was only an imaginative game. Perhaps that’s the way to look at psychological tests too. Play the game, give the ‘right’ answers, completely hoodwink your potential employer, keep your personality and thoughts to yourself and get that job. No pain, simply gain.
‘In dreams we see the in-betweens.’ How’s that for a t-shirt slogan? Many dreams portray sets of opposites, either-or dilemmas, paired t-shirts. Here are some examples taken from the kind of common dream themes everyone experiences from time to time:
Dream 1
I am climbing higher and higher, enjoying the view but then I suddenly realise I’m too high. I spend the rest of the dream edging my way back down to the ground. Sometimes I make it, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I stop when I’m near enough to the ground to feel safe but I can still get a good view of where I am.
Opposites:
High, off the ground versus low, on the ground.
Possible t-shirts:
‘Reach for the stars’
‘Keep your feet on the ground’.
Which t-shirt would you choose?
What might a good in-between t-shirt say?
Perhaps, ‘Keep one foot on the ground when you touch the stars’.
Dream 2
I’m driving a car. A wind begins to blow and I grip the steering wheel harder to keep the car on track. But the harder I grip the wheel the harder the wind blows. I wake up from this dream when I totally lose control of the car.
Opposites:
Driver in control versus driver out of control.
Possible t-shirts:
‘Get a grip’
‘Go with the flow’
Which t-shirt would you choose?
What might a good in-between t-shirt say?
Perhaps, ‘Set your goal and let the winds of change guide you’.
Dream 3
I am climbing a mountain. I come to a fork in the road. One path is steep and short. The other is gentle and longer. This is a recurring dream. Sometimes I choose the steep path, sometimes the gentle, but I always end up getting stuck. Neither road gets me to the top of the mountain.
Opposites:
Steep and short versus gentle and longer.
Possible t-shirts:
‘No pain, no gain’
‘Life was meant to be easy’.
Which t-shirt would you choose?
What might a good in-between t-shirt say?
Design your own slogan, but here are some questions to get you thinking:
• When do you get your best ideas? When you’re sitting at your computer trying to force them or when you walk away and take a break?
• Which approach to exercise is most likely to succeed in the long run:
(1) Joining a gym and lifting really heavy weights seven days a week for a year;
(2) doing affirmations about losing weight and getting fit while you relax and put your feet up;
(3) exercising at an enjoyable level three times a week and affirming your progress on the other four?
• How often have you, or someone you know, made a task harder than it needs to be – done something the hard way unnecessarily?
• Why do you complicate things sometimes?
• When you plan your work well, how much easier is it to do?
• How much do you gain from taking a painkiller when you have a migraine?
• How often is the simple solution the best solution?
• How would you teach a child an important life lesson?
• If you dig deep and uncover emotional pain, how much easier does your life become in the long run?
Examine your dreams for opposites. Imagine the either-or t-shirts. Then let your dreams help you to see the deeper, creative, colourful and beautifully balanced in-betweens that guide you forward.
Jane Teresa Anderson
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